Boston

I’m finding it hard to reconcile my thoughts and feelings on what happened Monday in Boston.

 

It hit me hard. It felt too close to home. While I didn't have any friends at the race this year, these are still my people. This is my community that was attacked - our comminuty. As runners, as endurance athletes, as people who enjoy pushing our limits. The love of the sport, the celebration that it brings, the amazing history, and the joy - it is ours.

 

I don't understand it.

 

I read everything I could find online in the hours following the bombings. I logged onto Twitter for the first time in my life to see if there was anything new. When I finally got home, I watched the news, trying to take it all in – and yet, I’m not sure I actually processed or truly heard any of the reports.

 

All I know is my heart felt heavy. It still does. Tears welled up in my eyes as I ran yesterday and then again when I heard from my Mom not long after getting back from my workout. My emotions are pretty raw right now and my need for a hug is pretty overwhelming at times.

 

My mind can’t comprehend why anyone would do something like this – although I’m not sure I ever want to understand or comprehend it.

 

Anyway, plenty of emotions have been shared online, on blogs and social media – most of it far more eloquently than I can sputter out at this moment.

 

I just know that last year, I left a little piece of my heart in Boston. No, I wasn’t running, but even as a spectator, that race grabs you and holds you. The city of Boston and all the other towns along the course, they make you feel welcome and alive and it is special and it is amazing. It is easily one of the most incredible sporting events I’ve ever witnessed and I’m so thankful I got the opportunity to experience it – even if it was just from the sidelines. I hope to be back there, experiencing it all over again one day. Perhaps one day I will even make it to the starting line as an athlete.

 

I feel incredible sadness for the people killed or injured on Monday, and anger at the person/people who did this. I hate that person/people for momentarily taking away the joy of the marathon, the joy and celebration that should be felt at the finish line.

 

That said, I have a pretty strong feeling the joy and spirit of the marathon will return, perhaps even stronger than before.

 

Sending love to anyone and everyone affected by the events in Boston.